November 12, 2009

I've decided to come out of the closet today. I am going to reveal that I have not been honest with myself or anybody else in cyberspace about who I am. The pictures you see on-line are me. However, they are a few years old. There is ONE, but my husband made me "look" different. The truth is...I weigh 202 pounds. That's difficult to admit. I mean really difficult.

I always was thin until kids. I lost all the weight with each one. About 2 years after the birth of our son I began to gain weight again. It threw me because I was a fitness instructor, spinning and Pilates. I shouldn't be gaining weight at the rate I was packing it on. After a year I put on 60 pounds. Then I thought I found the reason and found a diet that was very unreasonable to stick to. And, I lost all the weight. Then I had a hysterectomy. Then some very serious stressful months and years and illness. Which I will get into later...I packed on 90 pounds. Say what? Yes 90 pounds. I weighed more than I ever did pregnant.

I didn't want to be seen by anybody. It's embarrassing for me to go anywhere, because I have limited clothing. I didn't want anybody to know I had gained this much weight. The list goes on...My friends have been very supportive and still love me, but the vanity and pride have taken over who I am. I will also go in to details later.

Which brings me to today. I am going to blog about my journey to better health, better daily habits, better parenting, better friending, better homemaking, better wife...but more importantly a better daughter to God.

If you'll come with me, I'll have lots of questions that need answering and you'll be able to see my progress. I hope with this it might encourage other's who are in need of self exploration and getting centered on Jesus.

Kristin